in praise of bees

in praise of bees
who pollinate tirelessly
more than honey
our very survivability

just three to four frames tonight on the two mile walk. in a very intense, bad mood, having words with every vehicle passing. do not know why such anger persists in my being, the angst, the fretting.
i could blame it upon being out of work since March, of missing Nathaniel, the communication black out, the upcoming high school reunion, the lack of going anyplace with the photography, poetry and writing efforts.
just a mess i am.
three days running without reading the daily morning scriptures. i was just reading through them to get through with them, not gaining any holiness or repentance.
i mull upon what my friend Ron said to me, i am done with you, i see your true colors, when i did not respond to his Revelations on Revelation and such.
he had asked for money as well and i did not come through there either.
just a mess.
one day upon these walks i keep hoping some bolt of light will strike as it did Paul on the way to kill Christians and i will hear the word, and i will cease the fretful life.
just a mess.