What I offer

 I am most deceived I guess to think I have much to offer when so few could care less what I offer. 

Lee Boys

 Finally a Lee boy

John Clare Stokes 

Robert Lee in the beginning had a son 

From America Wheeler in 1870 he did come.

Jake Lee they would name the son

With Eliza, Mary and Dora in Benton he would run.

Then in '97 at 51 Lee lost his darling

Mourned three years til he met Lessie Starling.

Hard by the Suwannee Shoals they did dwell

Nellie, Louise, Pearl, Meck, Hattie, Ethel, Eunice and Estelle

Til, whew, finally in the year 20 came,

Joe Lee the second son to carry the name.

This is one from several years ago, reposted and only Melissa liked it. I’m going to delete it. I get angry but how many years has it been thus? 

Monday Monday

Roscoe and i are chilling today with power. We have washed clothes, picked up some sticks, talked to Alexis, we couldn’t when off line. We put nectar in the hummingbird feeders. We did other things than have to be concerned with a generator and the noise. It would be great to be at physical normal but thankful i can do what i can.  

As Yeats

 As Yeats

John Clare Stokes

He wanted so badly

to be a Yeats, a Frost

even a Wallace or Lawrence 

Poets whose words he

marveled how

There were moments

when he’d get this inner

strong compulsion 

of what he wanted to

compose

but his library of words

seemed inadequate 

the result never as 

the inner thought

The old Triton

the maiden so sublime 

fighting

to win her with lines

Man in the mirror

 Open eyes

John Clare Stokes

He was between the age of nine and ten

When his eyes were opened

Up until then

There were few mirrors to gaze in

He had little concept of being him

But in that new parsonage 

with the first bedroom ever his own

he stared long at this image 

the full length mesmerizing 

the scars down the left shoulder

chest, throat and arm from the boy of two

who pulled the coffee pot cord off

the stove scalding now at the between 

nine and ten causing the self conscious 

introspective, artistic poetic  life to begin

seldom going shirtless when swimming 

cringing when the scars were seen

with the non scarred staring and

offering their unnecessary commentary

Since between nine and ten

in that West Washington parsonage

when the boys eyes were opened

sad he would think of those without

mirrors or scars who never have a clue

who they are.

Heavenly Hurt, it gives us-

We can find no scar,

But internal difference,

Where the Meanings, are-

Emily Dickinson

“Man shouldn’t be able to see his own face — there’s nothing more sinister. Nature gave him the gift of not being able to see it, and of not being able to stare into his own eyes. Only in the water of rivers and ponds could he look at his face. And the very posture he had to assume was symbolic. He had to bend over, stoop down, to commit the ignominy of beholding himself. The inventor of the mirror poisoned the human heart.”

— Fernando Pessoa

Did they miss me?

 Since being offline since Friday with Hurricane Helene, the only time i could see some posts were when we went to get gas for the generator. I learned that only one asked about us, Ann from Archer. The majority kept posting their silly i’m hot, i’m bored, still no power. We had a generator for the first time after much trouble getting the right cord. It worked great. We don’t feel as anxious losing power. There is still work to do getting all the limbs piled up. We went to town to see the huge oak that fell in my sisters back yard then went to the carwash then DQ. When we got home the TV and internet were working. Plus Cash our feral cat had returned. 

Counts

 This week Mr Counts wife Katrina passed away. It was Mr Counts who hired me to work as the display and advertising person. Mr Counts was a strong Christian and the District people were always on him. He finally resigned though I think he was fired. He and I got a raw deal from JCPenney. 

Waiting on Helene

 Sitting around in anticipation of a long night. Always somewhat nervous due to the large pines in the yard. Anxious about the generator never used. Not thrilled with toying with it in the night if needed, which if things go like any high winds, we will. Interested in seeing how the two loads of dirt keep water out of the back yard. 

And the cats in the stable

 And the cats in the stable

Shaker Village 

Kentucky

Rulers of the yard

We have Monarchs 

But no Viceroys 

We need royalty 

To rule the yard

To the Tides

 There are times

I portend

I do miss

The ocean....

I cannot hide

There are times

That I am drawn

Toward the tides...

I have to say

There are the days

I roil upon

The inner waves...

While in my mind

I find

The break of infinity

Time and time

Again

In this ocean.

Johnclarestokes 

To the tides

Throne of John

Throne of first John 

Once I was a king with a throne

I ruled the realm from Faith, Rose

Orange and Dickson in the land

of Sopchoppy county Wakulla

There was a sister one Paula Jean

meant to sit upon the throne

but she came gender wrong

Paddles up

 Paddle up

John Clare Stokes

It’s again about that time 

The current should be slowing

the shoals less roiling

a day or even two to find.

Helene

Finally after having to go to several places to find the dryer plugs, Mr Davis got the cord built and plugged in.

Now to see is power goes and it works. 

 So another hurricane is coming our way. As usual, still the generator isnt ready. Mr Davis is coming today with a homemade cord to hook it up. I am still not happy with the setup. I should have just taken the plunge and got a whole house. Melanie has bugged the stew out of me. And when it’s hooked up i will still need to flip switches and worry about running out of gas.So frustrating.

Pray the power stays on! Though it’s doubtful. We have a squirrel who regularly trips it. 

Mr Davis came and wouldn't you know the plug he got was wrong, so hes gone to get the right one!

Daughter Day

 Daughter day

In 2002 we had a daughter Brittany Nixon for about a year. At the time Melanie and I were foster parents and we had Brittany, whose father and mother were in prison for the murder of her step sister, then 8 months old. We were going through the adoption process when a relative showed up from Daytona to claim custody of her. It was a tough day when we handed her over to Dept of Family Services. We left a photo book for her to remember us but we felt the relative would never show her as she had such a negative view of fostering.

We never saw Brittany again. So we actually have two children we hold hope for someday seeing again.

Got Gas

 Melanie said where could she get gas? She thought she would have to come and get the cans for the generator. I had to tell her Roscoe and I drove down and got it this morning. One station was already out. I’m not supposed to be driving. 

Trump

 What a shame in 2020 we were in the pandemic lie wearing masks. Taking deadly vaccines. Allison is seen behind Trump wearing a Trump mask. 

Up the holler

 Up the holler 

John Clare Stokes

So grateful in the fall of twenty twelve

We were able to take mamma to see

The old holler where she came to be

As we rode to Crumpler she would tell

now that was where Evelyn and I 

took that poor snake and burnt it

And there is where we paid with script

Where up Crumpler Mountain we’d slip

There’s the Methodist Church where Rev Looney

first suggested I should attend Asbury

Where Luke and I were later married

Where Gerald always held in my heart a tune

The old whistle post just beyond the church

Still towered rusting, once calling miners home

Out from the Pocahontas hills into the stucco homes

Or roused at night, the wailing telling that deep down something

had gone terribly wrong

Turning to return to Bluefield then Princeton

Rounding slowly another steep switch back

In my imagination I could clearly see

Her daddy’s bus full of miners and one

found kitty named Black Daisy

Bringing it home for his sweet Clara Jean.

Old Joe

 Now, with his son and daughters long grown and gone, and with his wife sick and away, Joe Griffis, living in the drafty weathered clapboard house he had inhabited for nearly 40 years, was thinking that he could do all that he knew how to do--all that he had always done--and it came out in frustration, thoughts of time passing like a river flowing, and harsh words for the black men who were working the waste wood. Ray Washington Cracker Florida, some lives and times

Kaintuckbrakes

 Kaintuckbrakes

Deep in the wild never glade

Where moccasins and bull gators stayed

And even Seminoles dared not wade

We came upon this lair of despair

Where in the oaken trees hung effigies 

To which these padded blueskins prayed

O give us great Ruppking a victory

To prove we do not follow Thee vainly

But the Ruppking was tauntingly silent

And into extinction went the Kaintuckbrakes

While Gators and moccasins mocked their fate.

Dish Washer

 Today Rick Davis my electrician came over to help install the dishwasher we had to buy. The old ones motor burned up due to the polarity being reversed in the outlet. It turned out to be quite the task as nothing wanted to go easy. By 2 we had it in. 

Time to grind

 In the sweet 

Johnclarestokes 

Soon comes the time

To grind the cane

Strip the stalks

Standing in the field

Gather the strainers

Sharpen the machete 

Scrub the kettle clean

Grease the rollers

Stack the bottles 

Teach again the oxen

The routine of

clockwise circling

Pleasant Hill

Kentucky

We hung the summer

 We hung the summer

Johnclarestokes 

In the loft above the straw strewn

in the cool dim air pungent with

the fields yield of toiling long

fading to the muted hues once

we knew vibrant to the light reaching

through the autumn 

through the winter 

to the spring returning

In lofts we hung the dying 

to the fields of summer giving life.

Pleasant Hill

Kentucky

Three days

 But for just three

I almost wish we were butterflies and liv’d but three summer days-three such days with you I would fill with more delight than fifty common years could ever contain. 

John Keats

Morning orison

 Morning Meditation in the Wood of God

And from the arching gilded lichen limb

Palmetto spread in fronds of praise

The Tibia flute parsed the morning hymn

 as moss bearded seers in rhapsodie swayed

to the song of the ancient of days;

Hushed in the Gloria Patri wonder

the congregation of the understory:

Con Amore! in the wood winds he comes

as the canebrake trembles at the feet

 of the blessed wild One.

Come freely to the tree of life

climb boldly to the azure heights

In the haven of the wood of God

where ne'er the proud dare trod.

Just you

I don’t who you are seeing these posts, there are only about six at best, just wanted to let you know most of the entries today are only here. Some days I tire of the lack of larger interest, then the comments from some, that I just don’t want to bother. 

The new year

 Rosh Hashanah 

Behold the new year upon us

When comes the King among us

To deem whom shall remain this year

Whom shall dwell beyond the tear

A mystery among us today

Prepare your self properly.

Song of the Shaker

 Shaker Village at Pleasant Hill

Harrodsburg, Kentucky

I can already feel this shaking within

The simple line, the swirling,spiraling

Upward, upward, we are spinning

This shaped note upon my lips forming.

In Wondrous Light

 The light it's wondrous circuit takes

Upon no creature does it wait

In shadows night they turn

For in the dark they learn

To align just so in the way

For but a touch of His day.

A distant sound

 I hear a language unknown

I travel in a wilderness alone

I sing the strains of a forgotten song

I think the long gone are calling me.

I hear a language I had not known. Psalm 81:5b

Promised Lands

 In the hinder years the salesmen came

Promising Craftsmen in every yard

And so we left our Deere’s of green

For the promised land grass was so hard.

palette of Cicadas

 It’s not a random thing

The cicada color scheme

I’m always in awe

Of the artistry in creatures

Who fly and crawl

Ten Years After

 Ten years after

Once two walked along the beach of Cumberland 

amid the regal ruins of long burnt Dungeness 

The gulls and terns led the way that day

Their pace slow to not let us lose our way.

Death of a Monarch

 Wouldn’t you think

If you were soon to die

To your known existence 

You’d adorn colors of gloom

To enter the emerald tomb

But no, they meet it in creative

Fashion that brings joy

They must have been told

This is not your end as

in even greater glory they emerge

To lift in hues of vibrant orange-

yellows like little stained glass

windows offset in black

to rise far into the azure autumn 

from beauty to beautiful

From Joseph like coats to robes

Of Monarchs

The Villages

 "Baker Act"-ing Mama

by Aurelia D Wallace.

Because I can't remember

What I had for lunch, they

Think I'm getting senile.

I hear them whispering

About the Shady Elms.

Good God, I'm not ready

For Shady Elms! I can

Still read Greek, I know

The whole score of Lucia,

(Though they don't take me

To music anymore since

I've had to wear these paper

Pants). I can make Martha Washington's

Own recipe for Sally Lunn,

Without once peeking. I can

Recite the names and birthdays of all

Nine grandchildren, and I know

Franklin Roosevelt is dead.

                                 All they ask me, though,

Is my street number backwards

And what I had for lunch, what

Day it is. Of course I know

Where I live, silly: inside these bones,

This bag my skin. No one needs

To know is it they don't know

All days are Sunday--

As long as I can breathe

This spendid, cautious air?

First day

Ginny at the Villages

Vertigo

 The vertigo is not too bad now that i have been doing the Eiply(sic)maneuver. But my walking seems to be worse with me dragging the right leg and generally walking like a spaztic. Frustrating. The right hand was getting better but seems to have reverted. I don’t do enough exercises at home. I depended on Pt two days a week. I resume next week PT so maybe that will help. I think that along with all the other things has me frustrated. 

Always taken

 By not knowing much i always wind up being taken. The generator we ordered will not really do the job, needed a 50amp. The cord i ordered won’t work, Mr Davis making me one. The fill dirt i ordered is sand, i needed top soil. The dishwasher plug polarity was reversed and burned up the dishwasher. I get so put out with myself for being a dumbass.  Its expensive. 

That what friends are for

 Today long time friend Rick Bringger called to take me to lunch. We went to the buffet that used to be the Farmhouse out by the airport, The Skillet. It wasn’t crowded so i hope they are doing well. Afterwards Rick helped me put the heavy door back on the chicken coop.