Induced Vertigo

i do not think there is a reading. it comes too quickly. liking just to be liking. i am spinning. in control. a controlled spin. is there such a thing? at what time do i pull out? i have not flown this way before.
what is going on here? waiting for that volunteer hour to arrive to drive down to the gallery and hope today will be the day i decide whether i am staying or not. working on the blocks of wood i ordered, placing photographs on them, painting the sides, making the time go productively, sister hounding me, bring the play pen, check in, got the kids, mamma all alone, you going to come, on and on, messaging me.....
a photo set with the Basso bike and me, thinking of Basso bike gathering dust and missing air and pavement beneath his gatorskins, wondering what came of the miles we rode, so much circling in, missing,
and the print for Diane came, and i still say, it just is not impressive in the 9x12, it needed 30x60, but even money does not leave millionaires easily, and so we dream...and spin.
Since posting, this post has gotten two views. Two. I am in vertigo as to the quietness of it all.