Oh October

There was the time before OH NINE when the calendar turned to October, we looked forward to the cool fall days of riding the bicycle a hundred miles through the horse farms of Ocala, of running the 10K at the Great Forest Festival in Perry in thirty five minutes then jumping in the cold Ichetucknee and swimming upstream into the bracing current.
Now when the first click of that tenth month rolls I look back and am just thankful to still be here, to enjoy sitting in the backyard watching the cloudless sulphurs feed, of waiting expectantly for the Sandhill Cranes to return, listening for the first calls, of walking the dogs to the corner and back.
Long gone the speed once taken so granted and so hard worked for to maintain. The weight of years settling around the mid-section, the bicycles kept oiled and aired, yet unridden over five miles.
Melanie too greets October as an old acquaintance that came to visit, not quite remembering the visit that laid her down until after Thanksgiving in a coma, H1N1 ravaging her life and ours.
After our four year degree in suffering, we looked forward to the possible latter years of calm from sorrow. Then the tenth month arrived early in the third month and our little first two year old grandson Nathaniel was taken from us. Not in death, but in a separation of all communication from his grand parents and loved ones. We would gladly undergo again the stint and pacemaker surgeries, the induced coma, if we knew the outcome would be a reunion again with the joy of our lives.
We cannot fathom or understand why the suffering, why the separation. We strain to maintain an appearance of wellness, when within we are bleeding internally.
Oh October, once again be kind to John and Melanie!