Major General Todd Jesse

I will be

Mizpah for October 13th

I will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be My sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty. 2 Corin. 6:18

"Think, brothers! think, sisters! we walk in the air of an eternal Fatherhood. Every uplifting of the heart is a looking up to the Father. Graciousness and truth are around, above, beneath us, yea, in us." George MacDonald.

Today in the old Mizpah book, Given Oct 17, 1884 to A.L.P with love from Hamre, was Mother's birthday, 1853. Who were these people from so long ago? The name of A.P. faded on the October 17th entry beyond recognition. These people, known of God, members of his eternal family. Someday to meet A.P. and mother, and hear their story. The Mizpah of place, of time, from their time to our time.

Be Strong

In Honor

In honor of Robert E. Lee, who died on this day, 1870.

"General Lee died this morning at half past nine o'clock. He began to grow worse on Monday and continued to sink until he breathed his last this morning. He died as he lived, calmly and quietly, and in the full assurance of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. The places of business are all closed, the bells are tolling, and the whole community thrown into the deepest grief." Lexington

The first telegram announcing his death, sent by Dr.J.W.Jones to the Richmond Dispatch, that paper gave it to the Associated Press, and it was sent over the country and cabled to Europe.

Mizpah for October 12th

Stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong. I Corin. 16:13

"We never grow strong so fast, our religion never is so beautiful and praiseworthy, as when we are grappling with, and overcoming by the power of Christ, great and sore and protracted temptation." Pres. Finney.

Today is the day that Melanie, in 2009, after going on a full respirator and then a ventilator, was transported to Orlando Regional Medical Center via Ambulance from Lake Shore Hospital at 4AM.

The Waves Written at 11:19PM October 13th

The room fills
The room empties
The tears flow
The faces painted in pain
Cell phone urgency
ICU emergencies
We wait with loved ones
We pray the waves
Recede
And spare us in the wake
Peace be still
Come Lord
Come calm the waves
Oh Lord!

The photograph was of a strong man competitor, taken while in Orlando with Melanie. The competition was held for the Arnold and Winnie Palmer Children's Hospital down the street from ORMC. One of Dr Vallenwaller's favorite encouragements to us, whenever he would see us was to point to heaven and say, BE STRONG!

Mizpah Redux

He ever liveth

Mizpah for October 11th

He ever liveth to make intercession. Hebrews 7:25

"Man may be too little for your great matters. God is not too great for your small ones. Only give yourself to prayer, whatever may be the occasion that calls for it." Winslow

Miron Winslow (1789-1864) was an American Congregational missionary. He was born at Williston, Vt, graduated at Middlebury College, 1815, and at Andover Theological Seminary, 1818. In 1819 he went to Ceylon, as a missionary of the American Board's American Ceylon Mission, and served there(from 1836) in southern India for 44 years. He prepared a Tamil and English dictionary, completed in 1862.

As Jesus was the Lamb of God slain from the foundation of the world, has an everlasting priesthood, and is a continual intercessor; it is in virtue of this that all who were saved from the foundation of the world were saved through him, and all that shall be saved to the end of the world will be saved through him. He ever was and ever will be the High Priest, Sacrifice, Intercessor, and Mediator of the human race. All successive generations of men are equally interested in him, and may claim the same privileges. But none can be saved by his grace that do not come unto God through him; i.e. imploring mercy through him as their sacrifice and atonement; confidently trusting that God can be just, and yet the justifier of them who thus come to him, believing on Christ Jesus. Adam Clarke

The photograph is of Landon, my son, taken several years ago off the Atlantic Coast at Vilano. We were awaiting one of the Space Shuttle launches to the south.

Looking Diligently

Mizpah for October 10th

Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God. Hebrews 12:15

To receive a reprimand willingly shows that we love the virtue opposed to the fruit for which we are corrected, and consequently this is a sign of progress in perfection.
St Frances de Sales

St Frances de Sales (August 21, 1567- December 28, 1622) was Bishop of Geneva and is a Roman Catholic Saint. He worked to convert Protestants back to Catholicism, and was an accomplished preacher. He is known also for his writings on the topic of spiritual direction and spiritual formation, particularly Introduction to the Devout Life, along with his Treatise on the Love of God. His writings on the perfections of the Heart of Mary as a model of love for God influenced Jean Eucles to develop the devotion to the Hearts of Jesus and Mary.

The nature of apostasy: it is failing of the grace of God; it is to become bankrupts in religion, for want of a good foundation, and suitable care and diligence; it is failing of the grace of God, coming short of a principle of true grace in the soul, notwithstanding the means of grace and a profession of religion, and so coming short of the love and favour of God here and hereafter. Matthew Henry

So Loved

Mizpah for October 9th

God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. John 3:16

"Take courage! Lost, means loved! We never speak of losing what we do not value. Do not hesitate to accept the inference. If you are lost, you are still dearly loved." Rev James Vaughan.

Two years hence...

In the two years since this photograph of Melanie was taken in Orlando Regional, suffering from Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome bought on by the H1N1, face swollen from the oscillator leaking air from her lungs tearing, at her most critical state, she has almost completely made a full recovery. Her only issues now are with diminished hearing in one ear and an over-all lack of stamina.
She works full-time now as a Radiation Oncology RN in Gainesville, making the commute each morning from Lake City.
As for me, in the August leading up to Melanie's sickness, I had to have a stent in the widow maker main artery to the heart and later a pace maker for my bouts with Neurocardiosyncope episodes. I have long since recovered physically, but continue to struggle by way of occupation, or regaining gainful employment. We lost the Office Pro Cleaning business my two sons and I had, due to being at Melanies side and never felt led to try and keep the business. Sears, where I was working, closed unexpectedly and thus I am attempting at my Steve Job's age to find a place willing to hire someone usually over-qualified. Pray for us.
When people go through such ordeal and come out on the other side, often we stop thinking about or praying for them, thinking them 'out of the hospital' or 'out of danger', when, in some ways, the most difficult times have been the two years since Melanie and I recovered, attempting just to keep bills paid, ends met, etc....

That are His....

If you follow this blog of mine, you will recognize this photograph from an earlier post titled You Called? from September 22nd.
It continues to follow in that same spirit with, The Lord knoweth knoweth them that are His from 2 Timothy 2:19.
I especially liked the quote from Augustine, "Observe a tree, how it first tends downward that it may shoot forth upward. Is it not from humility that it endeavors to rise? There are those who grow up into the air without first growing at the root. This is not growth, but downfall."

The Vultures Eye

I told this story to a friend two years ago. It went like this. It was Friday, October 9th, 2009 and Melanie had come home, the end of her two week notice at Cancer Care of North Florida. She was not feeling well. She had a doctors appointment with Dr Randolph, of which I went with her, feeling bad for her and guilty of my own neglect of her. She thought she had a kidney stone, so she was sent for a CAT Scan at Lake Shore. By happen stance, the technician scanned up to her lungs, which showed her lower lungs filled with fluid. We went back to Dr Randolph, then back for blood work. We went home and Melanie spent the evening and all day Saturday in bed. On Sunday morning, Dr Randolph called and said we need to go to the hospital, to admit her for a culture in her blood. From Lake Shore, looking out Melanies window, I got my first glimpse of the vulture. He was flying low and circling. By that evening, Melanie had gone from the floor to ICU and continued to have trouble breathing. She was put on a full ventilator and calls were made to area hospitals.  All hospitals in the area were full except one bed in Orlando, if we left now, or wait tomorrow for the possibility of a bed opening in Shands, Gainesville. We opted to go at 3am to Orlando, via ambulance since a heavy fog kept the helicopter grounded.
I went home, packed and met Melanies parents in Williston the next morning, arriving in Orlando in the early afternoon. We learned from the doctors that Melanie had Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome and Swine Flu or H1N1. She was placed in isolation. Another doctor came and said Melanie qualified for a clinical trial for treating H1N1 with an oscillating ventilator. We gave permission and waited to see if she was selected. Several anxious hours passed and they said she was a candidate and was moved to the ICU floor, Bed 9. It was from this room I again saw the vulture soaring outside.
And thus, for the next two months until Thanksgiving eve, I sat with Melanie and prayed and looked so often out that little window to see the vulture soaring.
Once, while trying to get back to Orlando via the Ocala National Forest where I was staying over with a friend, I became lost. Nearly out of gas, and near despair, praying, suddenly, a vulture soared overhead. And right after that, over the hill, a tiny one pump gas station and directions to my destination!
Melanie, on Thanksgiving eve, was transported to Gainesville, Select Speciality Hospital to wean off the ventilator and rehab. It was a miracle healing of her body which went through so much trauma and near failure in all her vital organs over the course of the time in Orlando. From Select she spent time in Woodlands Rehab, returning home finally in January, where she continues to have lingering affects two years later. She now works full-time at North Florida Regional Cancer Center in Radiation Oncology.
This finally, is the short version of the above: When we were at Lake Shore, I prayer, a cry went out! We need an angel! We need an eagle to go for us! Will someone step forward to minister? No mighty eagle or angel came forward. Finally, from the back, the lowly, despised vulture stepped forward and said, Here I am, I will go! And thus, the harbinger of death was sent upon a mission of life!
What had been a symbol of death and despair for me was a sign of hope and life. I welcomed daily the vulture that became a symbol of Gods ever presence with us!